The Wearing of The Grin

Sorry for the lack of posts recently, but I just have not been able to put in my usual gaming time. February through May is a busy season for extracurriculars around these parts.

But I didn't want St. Patrick's Day to pass without posting my favorite Irish cartoon. (Yes, "McDonald" is Irish, not Scottish. Although, in all likelihood, it's probably Scottish if I go back far enough, and I do have a remarkable fondness for Uncle Scrooge McDuck. Also, I'm fairly keen on kilts.)

"Now isn't this sight enough to set the heart crosswise?"



The audio is a little bit out of sync, but you can find this one on The Looney Tunes Golden Collection Vol. 1 DVD set.

O/T Post: Oliver Cromwell's Election Day Message

Cromwell Dissolves Parliament

Tomorrow is election day here in the US, and it's going to be one of our semi-annual "throw the bums out" moments. Good. I'd like to see them all go so we could start over. The body politic needs a regular application of emetics to remain healthy.

Our political situation is not unique. Oliver Cromwell captured heart of the problem in a speech given when he dissolved the English Parliament on April 20, 1653. Now, Cromwell was a deeply wicked man, and no Irishman is allowed to even say his name without crossing himself thricely. But his rant against the Ruling Class (and that is what politicians of both parties have become) echoes down through history to our own day; eternally true, eternally relevant.

It also proves that they really could do insults well in those days. You have to admit that having someone rise to the podium of the House and call the Rt. Honorable Gentleman from the fine state of Wisconsin a "sordid prostitute" who has "no more religion than my horse: gold is your God!" would sound damn spiffy on C-SPAN.

It is high time for me to put an end to your sitting in this place, which you have dishonored by your contempt of all virtue, and defiled by your practice of every vice; ye are a factious crew, and enemies to all good government; ye are a pack of mercenary wretches, and would like Esau sell your country for a mess of pottage, and like Judas betray your God for a few pieces of money.

Is there a single virtue now remaining amongst you? Is there one vice you do not possess? Ye have no more religion than my horse; gold is your God; which of you have not barter’d your conscience for bribes? Is there a man amongst you that has the least care for the good of the Commonwealth?

Ye sordid prostitutes, have you not defil’d this sacred place, and turn’d the Lord’s temple into a den of thieves, by your immoral principles and wicked practices? Ye are grown intolerably odious to the whole nation; you who were deputed here by the people to get grievances redress’d, are yourselves gone! 

So! Take away that shining bauble there, and lock up the doors.

In the name of God, go!

Weekend O/T Post: A Three Patch Problem

I finally caught the new Sherlock series on PBS this week, and I thought they did an excellent job of updating the stories in clever ways while still being true to the characters. For example, Sherlock (played by a man with the marvelously Dickensian name of Benedict Cumberbatch) refers to the case being very much a "three patch problem," and then rolls up his sleeves to show his arm covered in nicotine patches. This is a riff on a direct quote from "The Red-Headed League," and it works perfectly.

It was also interesting to see Martin Freeman in action, since he was just cast as Bilbo in Peter Jackson's Hobbit movies. He'll be perfect: he already looks half-hobbit.

I thought I'd use this opportunity to publish a piece I wrote about Holmes in 2004 for Games Magazine. Although this is one of my off-topic posts, it's not that off-topic, since I focus on the gamesmanship that's a part of the stories and fandom. 

Although I don't get to write about fiction much any more, that's how my career began. My first credits were writing about horror for The Horror Show and Cemetery Dance, mysteries for Armchair Detective and Mystery Scene, and literature for The Thomas Wolfe Review and Bookpage, among others. Then I discovered that I could make a whacking huge amount of money as a tech and game writer, and my lit crit days pretty well ended. (Eventually, so would the whacking huge amount of money as a tech and game writer after the bottom fell out of the publishing industry. Which reminds me: have you bought anything through my Amazon links lately? [sound of tin cup rattling])

I'm a pretty hardcore Sherlockian. I've read the canon through several times, and I collect as much other Holmes media (Old-Time Radio, movies, TV, pastiches) as I can lay hands upon. This is one of the few times I really got a chance write about it, however.

Sherlock Holmes: The Great Game

To a small but dedicated group of followers, Arthur Conan Doyle’s Holmes and Watson stories are more than just great literature. They are part of what they call “the game,” in which Sherlockians maintain that Watson and Holmes were real, their adventures actually happened, and the stories were truly written by Watson with Conan Doyle serving as his literary agent. From this “gentle fiction,” as one author calls it, springs a wealth of writing of sometimes astounding imagination and wit, speculating on every detail of the stories and weaving elaborate theories to reconcile Conan Doyle’s sometimes dodgy dates and details. A massive new annotated set of the tales promises to reinvigorate the game for a whole new generation.

Leslie S. Klinger’s The New Annotated Sherlock Holmes (Norton, 2 vols., $75) takes a different approach from William S. Baring-Gould’s Annotated Sherlock Holmes, the two-volume set at the heart of every true Sherlockian book shelf (usually at the end of the shelf, propping up the rest of the books). Originally published in 1967, Baring-Gould’s massive work collects and annotates the 56 short stories and four novels, explaining obscure aspects of Victoriana and often elaborating on various hot-button Holmes-Watson issues, such as the marriages of Watson, Holmes’ missing years, and torrid speculations about Holmes’ relationship with Irene Adler (of “A Scandal in Bohemia”).

Though beloved by Sherlockians, Baring-Gould’s work (including his terrific mock biography, Sherlock Holmes of Baker Street) has long been a source of mild controversy for its chronological organization. Baring-Gould was dedicated to determining the order in which the adventures actually happened, and his placement of individual stories within the timeline has been hotly disputed among Sherlockians, who are capable of hotly (and quite amiably) disputing pretty much anything.

Hand Me My Gazetteer 
As an indicator of exactly how much material Klinger had to work with, one need only look to The Complete Baker Street Journal on CD-ROM (available at www.bakerstreethournal.com for $100). Published since 1947, the BSJ is the main journal of Sherlockian scholarship, and its complete archives fill four CD-ROMs in PDF format, adding up to some 16,000 pages of material. Every issue of the BSJ is included, from its origins to the year 2000, accompanied by cumulative indices and searchable through the included Adobe Reader software. Aside from the usual news and records of meetings one would expect in a publication such as this, there are countless articles dissecting every aspect of the “canon,” or “sacred writings” as it is known to the Baker Street Irregulars.

For instance, in Scandal in Bohemia, Holmes refers to the landlady as Mrs. Turner, yet we all know the landlady is Mrs. Hudson. The answer is, of course, prosaic: in the manuscript of "The Empty House," Doyle made the same mistake, but crossed out "Turner" and wrote "Hudson." In "Scandal," however, he didn't catch the error. This is a feast for Sherlockians, who have speculated that it was actually Martha Turner (the second victim of Jack the Ripper); that Turner was an alias used by Mrs. Hudson during a tryst with Holmes in a country hotel or inn, and Holmes simply slipped by using this name; that it was a character from The Boscombe Valley Mystery; and so on.

The late pulp writer Manly Wade Wellman used the Holmes/Hudson affair for a delightful flight of fancy called “The Great Man’s Great Son: An Inquiry into the Most Private Life of Mr. Sherlock Holmes” (found on Disc 1, Volume 1, Number 3 of the BSJ on CD-ROM). Wellman lays out a detailed case to prove that the illicit love child of Holmes and Mrs. Hudson was none other than … Jeeves, Bertie Wooster’s redoubtable gentleman’s gentleman in the P.G. Wodehouse stories. By the time Wellman fills in all the lacunae, you begin to believe it. (Wodehouse himself idolized Conan Doyle, so the speculation would have no doubt amused him.)

Making these connections is all part of the game, and the BSJ archives are a treasure trove of material, with such Holmesian figures as Christopher Morley, Edgar Smith, and Vincent Starrett sharing space with notable writers such as Wellman, Robert Bloch, John Dickson Carr, and Ogden Nash. The BSJ is still a thriving publication with four issues plus a special Christmas annual each year, with subscriptions starting at $25.

The Game is a Footnote 
Klinger has mined this treasure trove, much of it unavailable to Baring-Gould, for his New Annotated Sherlock Holmes. He dodges the chronological issue by organizing the 56 short stories according their order in the five collections Doyle published in his lifetime. (A third volume collecting and annotating the four novels is scheduled to appear in Spring 2005.) Though it will no doubt spare him many dissenting articles in the Baker Street Journal, it’s ultimately a less satisfying order than the Baring-Gould chronology (which links the tales into a flowing biography of Holmes and Watson) or even an arrangement by composition or publication (which would allow us to see Conan Doyle’s development as a writer).

Measured against the quality of the rest of Klinger’s work, however, this is a trifle. Klinger engages in the game with gusto. The new annotations and essays largely sidestep issues of mainstream literary criticism to integrate the last 30 years of Sherlockian scholarship, offering numerous alternate theories while elaborating on the lives and connections of peripheral characters. Was Moriarty a figment of Holmes’ imagination? Was Holmes replaced by an imposter after his death at Reichenbach Falls?

The notes also explain many details of Victorian life, helping to establish locations, explain slang, and place story aspects in their historical and cultural context. The book begins with a brisk but immensely informative introduction explaining the time and place of the stories and offering biographies of Doyle, Holmes, Watson. Both volumes are heavily illustrated with the original Strand drawings and period photographs, which prove quite useful when trying to visual a gasogene, for instance. Some of Baring-Gould’s annotations are carried forward intact, but much more is added.

On the other side of the aisle is the nine volumes of the complete Oxford Sherlock Holmes, which offers A Study in Scarlet, The Sign of Four, The Hound of the Baskervilles, The Valley of Fear, The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes, The Casebook of Sherlock Holmes, The Memoirs of Sherlock Holmes, and The Return of Sherlock Holmes. (Most of these titles are available in matching paperbacks for less than $10.) Each has a lengthy introduction about the background and writing of the world, with extensive endnotes dedicated to Conan Doyle’s sources as well as Victoriana. Frankly, most devoted fans will find the books nicely complimentary: Klinger focusing on the inner life of the stores, and the Oxford editions focusing on them as works of literature.

The Final Problems 
And the Holmes industry continues to thrive. New books, novels, stories, and pastiches are published each year, creating a modest cottage industry dedicated to chronicling the adventures of the Holmes, Watson, and even peripheral characters from the series. Loren D. Estleman’s entertaining Sherlock Holmes vs Dracula: The Adventure of the Sanguinary Count and Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Holmes are back in print, and Laurie King recently published volume 6 of her critically acclaimed Mary Russell series. Beginning with The Beekeepers Apprentice (Holmes retired to the country to become a beekeeper in his later years), King’s series teams Holmes with a young American woman in a series of vastly entertaining mysteries. A quick Amazon search for “Sherlock Holmes” will yield a surprisingly wealth of new material ranging from pedestrian pastiches to polished fiction.

He continues to thrive in other media, as well. Over the past few years MPI Home Video issue a dozen of the original films starring Basil Rathbone and Nigel Bruce as Holmes and Watson, and the complete run of Grenada television series starring Jeremy Brett. Holmes even made his long awaited-return to computer games with the adventure “Secret of the Silver Earring” (see our review this issue).

This fall [2004] saw the publication of Sherlock Holmes: The Hidden Years, a terrific new hardcover anthology edited by Michael Kurland, author of a series of novels about Professor Moriarty and editor of the previous Holmes tribute My Sherlock Holmes. The Hidden Years recruits authors Peter Beagle, Carolyn Wheat, Richard Lupoff, Rhys Bowen, and others to fill in the gap of “The Great Hiatus,” the three years between Holmes alleged death at Reichenbach falls and his reappearance in “The Empty House.” Only one of these stories is a true pastiche (that is, a work written in the style of the original), while others use a variety of styles to challenge the great detective (sans his Boswell) in mysteries ranging from Tibet to San Francisco to New Orleans and beyond.

Conan Doyle’s work uniquely lends itself to this kind of lavish attention due to its wealth of detail, from place names to odd characters. The Sherlockians take mystery stories that are, in themselves, literary puzzles solved by a master, and apply his techniques of observation and deduction to tease interesting theories from the text. Had Doyle written more, or been more careful with some of his dates and characters, perhaps the game never would have evolved the way did.

Or perhaps not. The game began while the stories were still being written, with Andrew Lang’s 1904 “open letter to Dr. Watson” (published in Longman’s Magazine), analyzing the story “The Three Students.” Klinger cites Father Ronald Knox’s 1911 “Studies in the Literature of Sherlock Holmes” (written as a parody of Biblical scholarship) as the beginning of Holmes studies. Knox favored using a “method by which we treat as significant what the author did not mean to be significant, by which we single out as essential what the author regarded as incidental.” In this, he was merely following the dictum of the Master: “the little things are infinitely the most important.”

These “little things” continue to fascinate over a century after the original tales appeared. Indeed, can any other author lay claim to such a serious examination not of his work, but of the fictional life of his characters? As legendary Sherlockian Christopher Morley famously observed, “Never has so much been written by so many for so few.” Perhaps a book like The New Annotated Sherlock Holmes will prove that it’s not for so few after all.

A Friendly Sherlock Holmes Quiz

This is the quiz I wrote to accompany the Holmes piece.

There are two kinds of readers of the canon: those who have read and enjoyed them, and those who have read and memorized them. The following quiz attempts to find a happy medium between the two.

1. Watson used numbers in the titles of several stories.  Add the following together: Napoleons, Orange Pips, Gables, Students, then multiply by the number of Garridebs,

2. Name four shades of red hair described by Jabez Wilson.

3. What was the hiding place of the blue carbuncle?

4. What made the face yellow?

5. This was the first case Holmes tackled.

6.  Who was the victim at Thor Bridge?  Who was the perpetrator?

7. Where in London is 221B Baker Street?

8. What kind of tobacco does Holmes prefer?

9. What does Holmes write in bullet holes in a wall of 221B?  (Take extra pipe and plug of shag if you can name the kind of bullet he uses)

10. What was one of the books Holmes dropped when, in disguise, he bumped into Watson in “The Empty House.”

11. Which original stories were not written by Watson?

Technical difficulties...

"

Spent the entire morning in the ER with a crushed toe that wouldn't stop bleeding, so I'm going to spend the rest of the day in my happy place, which is filled with Vicodin and cheese steak a generous selection of the films of Ishiro Honda.

Have a nice weekend.

WEEKEND O/T POST: Arkangel Shakespeare

From time to time I run personal or off-topic posts on weekends.  The following review is something I wrote about the amazing Arkangel audio versions of the complete works of Shakespeare. I'm a complete Shakespeare nut, so when I discovered this series in the library I just devoured it. Thanks to my blogmother Julie D. for originally publishing a longer version of this at Catholic Media Review.

The genius of William Shakespeare is on full and glorious display in one of the most ambitious projects in recording history. In the 1990s, television and film producer Bill Shepherd (husband of actress Eileen Atkins, who turns in some great performances on the set) spearheaded the complete recorded plays of Shakespeare. Over 3 years and at a cost of $3 million dollars, all thirty-eight plays, complete with some 600 speaking parts and including a wide range of sound effects and music, were produced under the direction of Clive Brill. From the loftiest heights of Shakespearean majesty (Hamlet, Lear, Macbeth) to the furthest and most forgotten corners (Pericles, Timon of Athens, Cymbeline), every word of every play was committed to tape with a full cast of seasoned Shakespearean talent and even a few marquee stars.

It would be impossible to cover the entire set in any depth, but some performers and plays stand out. The greatest actor to work on the Arkangel Shakespeare was Sir John Gielgud, who was 94 when he recorded his two roles. Gielgud plays the narrator-poet Gower in Pericles, as well as “Time, the Chorus” in The Winter’s Tale. His fading voice in the Time soliloquies lends a particularly bittersweet poetry to the role. The speeches are long, and Gielgud is clearly at the end of his life. His majestic voice has lost much of its plummy tone, but he still delivers note-perfect performances.

The London Independent was present when the Gielgud recording was made, and noted how Sir John (who was paid a single day-rate like everyone else) asked if could also do the Chorus in Henry V. He was turned down because Brian Cox had already done it. “Oh well, he’s very good,” replied Gielgud. Although Cox is probably still best known to moviegoers as the original Hannibal Lecter in Manhunter, he’s also one of the premiere Shakespeareans of his generation, and turns in solid voice work on several of the discs.

Fans of Shakespeare in Love, in which Joseph Fiennes played Shakespeare playing Romeo, will be delighted to hear Fiennes in a complete production as Romeo, opposite Maria Miles as Juliet. Like most Romeos, he’s too old for the role, but he does a respectable job, only rarely letting some of the play’s more sticky sentimentality overwhelm him. Just watch out for the kissing scenes. They sound like someone got his lips caught in a bottle.

Simon Russell Beale does excellent work as Hamlet, with a performance reminiscent of Kenneth Branagh’s in his own film of Hamlet. No complaint there, since Branagh managed to bring out the bitter humor of the Prince without getting lost in the world-weariness that can easily overtake the character. Beale handles the play’s many abrupt shifts in tone with finesse, and he’s matched by excellent performances all around. Shakespeare’s finest play is the jewel in the crown of the set, as it should be.

Cieran Hindes (best known as Caesar from the HBO miniseries Rome) tackles the incredible poetry of Antony and Cleopatra with remarkable skill, playing a passionate Antony to Estelle Kohler’s steamy Cleopatra. Hinds also turns in a touching performance in the role of Leontes in The Winter’s Tale, handling the shimmering, mystical finale in whispered, delicate tones that would be impossible on a stage. For those who are less familiar with this, one of Shakespeare’s “problem plays”, the Arkangel disc is a great place to start.

The unity of the recording project gave the producers an opportunity for some interesting casting choices. Julian Glover plays Bolingbroke/Henry IV and Jamie Glover plays Prince Hal/Henry V throughout the history plays (Richard III, Henry IV 1 & 2, and Henry V). The father/son team might seem like stunt casting, but both are veteran Shakespeareans who acquit themselves expertly throughout. Jamie, in particular, makes a convincing transformation from the callow youth of Henry IV Part 1 to the stirring hero of Henry V. Some other notable performances include Rupert Graves in the difficult role of Richard II, Adrian Lester as Antony in Julius Caesar, Trevor Peacock as Lear, and Bill Nighy as Antonio in Merchant of Venice.

Not every performance works, but given the vastness of the project it’s surprising to see how few duds there are. I’ve listened to Harriet Walter’s Lady Macbeth many times, and the performance still doesn’t sit right with me. Her voice seems to high and quirky to pull off the role. Everyone around her, however, does a fine job, including Hugh Ross as Macbeth and three pitch-perfect witches.

The low point of the series is what should have been one its centerpieces. A Midsummer Night’s Dream is a mess. The fairy voices are digitally processed and hard to understand, the music is terrible, and the Caribbean accents for Tatania and Oberon are reminiscent of too many gimmicky modern productions. If you want to experiment, Dream is not the place to do it. Bad artistic choices abound, from sound effects, to casting, to music. Brill got most everything right elsewhere in the cannon, so he must have saved up all his mistakes for Dream.

That’s really the only dud in the batch, however. The production values are spot on throughout, with Brill and his engineers creating an incredible sonic setting for the plays. A full range of sound effects is brought to bear, and these help flesh out the action which you normally either see in performance or read in the stage directions of the text. Whether it’s the opening storm of The Tempest, the battlefield of Henry V, or the grotesque torments of Titus Andronicus, the effects play a crucial role in bringing the plays to life. All of the productions are fully scored, and while some of the musical choices are simply puzzling, most nicely compliment the drama.

The cumulative effect of the entire endeavor is astounding. Perhaps the most exciting part is getting to explore those lesser known gems that are never performed on stage or in film. (For example, Cymbeline, a fairy tale with an absurdly labyrinthine plot, is a fascinating find.) The series is a treasure unequalled and, for many, still undiscovered. I only stumbled across them two years ago in the library, and was able to hear all 38 through the interlibrary loan system in my county. The complete set is available for $360 on Amazon, with individual plays going for about $14 (for 2 discs) to $17 (for 3 discs). More information can be found at arkangelshakespeare.com.

The Arkangel Complete Shakespeare is a Globe of the mind, where you can disappear into the words and performances any time you like.

Weekend Post (O/T): Wanton Media Consumption

I am an avid consumer of all forms of media. I'm either reading, watching, playing, or listening to something. Here's a rundown of some of this week's highlights for the weekend off-topic post.

Watching

After reading the obituaries for Maury Chaykin, I realized that I'd only see one episode of A&E's Nero Wolfe, and that one long ago. We watch a lot of British mystery shows at Casa McD, but I was curious how the Americans would handle a classic literary mystery adaption like this. The answer is: pretty darn well. Tim Hutton is a snappy Archie Goodwin, and Chaykin is volatile and neurotic as Wolfe. The oddest part is the use of an ensemble cast in different roles each week. Aside from a few repeating characters, all the other actors play a different character in every mystery. It's a very good American take on the classic British lit-mystery format (Sherlock Holmes, Poirot, Marple, Midsomer Murders, etc).

As for Chaykin, the thing from him that I still remember best is "Mr. Potatohead! Mr. POTATOHEAD!" Can you name that movie?

Reading

Gillian Anderson as Lady Dedlock

Bleak House has been an ongoing project for the past two months. I'm always reading a few books at once, so a 1,000 page Victorian novel is going to take a little bit of time. Fortunately, Dickens wrote it to be read that way, since the story would have originally been printed as a serial. (That's why all his characters had certain phrases or characteristics that were always repeated: to help people remember who they were from month to month.) This may not be the best place to start with Dickens if you've never read him before (Great Expectations or Hard Times are probably a better first experience), but it's certainly the best writing Dickens ever did. If you've never seen the most recent adaptation (with Gillian Anderson and Charles Dance) make sure you do. I think it's still on Netflix streaming, and it's superb.

Solitaire by David Parlett. Parlett is the best writer on cards, period. Alas, I think his book on Solitaire is out of print. That's a shame, because it's not just a collection of 400 games and variants, but also a thoughtful look at the game of solitaire itself. Parlett categorizes the games, ranging from simple games of luck and patience, to logic problems that require as much thought as chess. This book desperately needs to be back in print. No one has ever written a better book on the subject.

Memorize the Faith (and Most Anything Else) by Kevin Vost. I teach religion to 8th graders, so I was looking for some interesting new techniques in this book. The author's method is based on the ancient "method of loci," which associates certain facts with different discreet locations, such as rooms and objects in a house. I'm not far into it, so I'm not sure what I think of the method. I've worked with teenagers for many years, and their retention of rote facts is very poor. While rote learning was probably over-emphasized in the past, it is drastically under-emphasized now. I'm 42-years-old, and I can still recite poetry and facts I learned at their age. (I had a classical education that emphasized that sort of thing.) I'm looking for any method I can use to help them retain hard knowledge. This may or may not be the method, but it's certainly a different approach.

Killer Cribbage by Dan Barlow. I've read half of this book, and my 9-year-old daughter still took me to the cleaners ... twice. (She said, "I don't think that book is working.) Maybe all the best secrets are in the second half? Actually, it's a very good book that offers some excellent advice, My daughter is simply a card shark. I'm so proud.

Listening
I've mostly been listening to Old Time Radio. The archive.org site has a complete collection of Gunsmoke episodes in perfect sound quality. This is some of the best entertainment you'll find, and it's free! Load up your iPod with OTR and you will not be disappointed.